Don’t panic I am not having one just yet.


My question is simple, around what age are you deemed to be having a mid-life crisis when you are just acting mental???


I say it’s a simple question as surely the answer is when you reach the middle of your life? However this would mean knowing when that was going to happen! For example I don’t think anyone would have said Kurt Cobain was having a mid-life crisis at 13 (well possibly Courtney Love but she doesn’t count) and likewise if someone lived till 106 then they couldn’t have one until they were 53 which is surely too late?


If you ask me (not that anyone did) you have to be older than 37 but younger than 50. I have no idea why that particular age range as to be fair I could easily have picked 36 to 49. But as some sort of justification


  1. 37 is far enough past 20 that you are talking in decades since your early 20’s and not years
  2. At 37 you are more likely to me the parent of a teenager than dating one
  3. 37 is still young enough that you could go completely mental and not have to worry about heart problems or breaking a hip
  4. When you reach 50 you definitely have fewer years till retirement than you have already worked
  5. A 50-year-old in a convertible just somehow looks wrong (although we all still wish we owned the car)
  6. Every year past 37 it seems more and more undignified to be steaming in a pub (not that it ever seems dignified)


Having said that it’s more likely that after the age of 50 you will be able to do your mid-life crisis in style. How many 37 year olds have the money in the bank to just ditch their life jump on a plane and become a new age hippie in the Bahamas or the drifter poet in an Italian wine bar. Maybe then the answer is that those people currently at the age of 50 start a mid-life crisis fund to be accessed by the next generation (sort of a pay it backwards idea). That way when it comes around everyone can really just let loose.


For me if and when I do have my mid-life crisis (speaking to some of my friends you’d think I’d been having one since I was 20) I want it to be spectacular. None of this just buying a car that makes me look like an aging stoner trying to look “cool” or suddenly quitting my job to follow my life long dream to make it big with my band. I don’t know yet what it will be (I guess that’s the fun) But when it comes I want to be the guy that everyone looks at and say’s “god how embarrassed would you be if that was your dad”


Why would I want to be the embarrassing guy? Easy! One of the greatest privileges of age (in my own oh so humble opinion)  is not having to care what people think. Now I am not saying that I overly care now (though this of course does not apply to you my lovely readers) as to be honest I am of the  opinion that if I don’t know you then you don’t know me well enough to have an opinion. But I think with age, judging by observation rather than experience, that you seem to care less about what people think rather than more.


I may well have my mid-life crisis in the next 10 years and if this blog still exists then I promise to tell you all about…………


(I was going to put a disclaimer down here, something about no offence intended etc etc etc But instead I will credit you all with the knowledge and intelligence to know i am simply talking shit) (Alternatively you tube the disclaimer by the offspring, in fact do that anyway if you haven’t heard it before it funny as…)